The Journey of Love & Life

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Ultrasound today!!! 19w 4d

Here are pics from today’s ultrasound. Ethan is great and weighs 11 oz!

Everything looks great and we couldn’t be happier. He behaved for the most part of the ultrasound until the very last minute. He started playing with his “toy” again. I was told by the tech that I should get used to this; It’s nature! I guess its the one thing he will always hold on to!

I cried for most of the u/s just knowing that we've passed every milestone. How I just LOVE happy tears.

There are 3 more pics that I will post from the 3D u/s. I am not kidding... Ethans head & face are shaped like a heart in the pics. I'm sure its just the angle of the camera but it's really priceless...stay tuned for those pics!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I just love him.......

I am 110% positive that I have the most amazing husband in the world. I just love seeing/hearing his excitement about Ethan. He actually knows how far along we are…like down to the DAY! In conversations, he’d say, “ we’re 18 w 4 days pregnant with a baby boy”. Most folks would be really generic and say 4 months but each day is so significant to him and to me.

As of Sunday, we were 19 weeks. It’s so amazing to me. With my previous pregnancy with Madison I was in the hospital on complete bedrest and fighting off an infection at 19w and praying that she would not make an entrance within the next day/hour. I have never been at home or able to work or even happy at this stage in pregnancy. It’s simply a blessing. After being pregnant for a total of 54 weeks over the past 2.5 years, we are starting a new chapter of un-chartered territory!

Chris came home from work yesterday with a surprise to celebrate this milestone in pregnancy. He had a dozen red roses and a card in his hand and the biggest smile on his face. The card read, ( and this was posted with Chris’ permission)

“ Happy 19 weeks and a day :0) I love you so much

and

I thank you for your courage and not giving up.

You mean the world to me “

Okay…so, how was I supposed to respond to THAT??? I just hugged him as tightly as I could and sobbed a river full of happy tears on his shoulders! He held me (just like he does thru happy or sad tears) and then asked…WHY ARE YOU CRYING???? (LOL….Umm, “why NOT Sir? )

I just love every fiber of his being! And more importantly, I love the love that we have for each other.

I couldn’t imagine this journey without him! I thank God for blessing me with such a wonderful husband and for breathing into our marriage! What a wonderful journey!!! I can't wait for the moment when we can both lavish all of our love on Ethan!

Thursday, April 15, 2010

quick update & praise reports!!! :0)

So, just wanted to give a quick update!

PUT your hands together and give GOD praise because the regular contractions have ceased!!!!!! I started the 17p injections on Friday and the contractions finally stopped on Monday night. I do have irregular Braxton Hicks contractions every now and then but that is the new normal for the remainder of the pregnancy. I’m fine with those since I know that my cervix does not respond to them. I have been able to maintain normal activities and should not have to do any modifications or bed rest as long as my cervix behaves ( which I think it will)

We are now18 w 4 days pregnant. Can I tell you a secret (not really )?

This is the LONGEST period of time that I have been pregnant without complications. With the period 3 I had either already delivered or we either knew that delivery was eminent. So, when I say that Chris and I are thankful for EACH DAY of this pregnancy, I really mean it!!!! Okay , so now you can put your hands together and give GOD praise again!~

I feel like Chris and I are about to experience a new level of love and excitement that we have not known before. It almost doesn't seem real but we're excited beyond words. If we can just agree on a nursery theme for Ethan’s room, I'll be even better. I'm thinking more of a designer room (pastel blue, green, with khaki/brown accents) with his name on the wall. Chris REFUSES to have his "baby boy" in a room with the color GREEN!!!! OMG! He wants a sports themed room. So, we HAVE to compromise!!!. pray for us ;o)

Lord, Thank you for making all things NEW!

Another reason to put your hands together & and offer a praise to God… My dear Friend JW has experienced FOUR losses in a short period of time. Her strength & faith despite all that she has been thru is simply AMAZING to me. I am elated to report that JW and her husband had a beautiful baby girl today. I couldn’t hold back the tears when I saw the picture of their princess. It just felt like a win for “our” team. I know that you all don’t know her but could you just say a prayer of thanksgiving & blessing on their behalf.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

A little scare….

So, on Thursday afternoon I had quite a bit of abdominal/vaginal pressure. I didn’t think much of it since Ethan is hanging out really low and I could feel his head DIRECTLY on my cervix. By Thursday night, I felt a familiar discomfort that caused my heart to race & my mind to wonder. I knew all too well what I needed to do…prop my feet up and drink plenty of water. I did both but the familiar discomfort remained. What familiar discomfort you might ask? I was contracting and they were nice and strong. My uterus was as hard as a brick.

I tried to act as normal as possible in the presence of my husband because I didn’t want to alarm him. However, he knew the look of concern on my face , which was everything BUT normal. He asked me what I was feeling. I quickly turned my face away from him and replied, “ Contractions” as I tried to hold back the tears. The usual questions followed…Are you ready to go to the hospital? Do you want to call Dr. G? I was totally numb emotionally and the only thing that I knew was well, NOTHING!

I went to bed, rubbed on Ethan for a while and prayed for peace and the absence of the contractions. I think there were some more important prayers on Gods mind because the peace never arrived & the contractions continued. Chris & I were both restless and really couldn’t find the right words to say. After tossing & turning for over 2 hours, I decided to try the recliner in hopes that the contractions would diminish, peace would arrive accompanied by my dear friend, Sleep! NO LUCK! The contractions continued and I stared into the darkness wondering “ how much longer can I do this”…

By 3:45am I woke up from a brief period of sleep & decided to sleep in our bed. Thankfully, I was able to sleep some what and the contractions were more tolerable.

I arrived to work on Friday and watched the clock like a hawk waiting for Dr. G’s office to open. I called at 8:56am and informed the receptionist ( who is very familiar with my history) of what was going on. She put me on hold for 30 seconds and returned to say” Dr. G. wants to see you NOW, how soon can you make it here?” I was beyond relieved! IMMEDIATLEY, I was out the door and making the 4 minute drive to his office.

I was taken back after a very short wait.I explained the events of Thursday night with the u/s tech and she proceeded with a vaginal u/s to check the cervix. Just as she starts the scan, I start contracting. I had her to feel my uterus so that she would know the feeling that I was describing. She says, “ OHHH YEEAAAHHH…that IS a contraction”

Scan continues and thank GOD, the cervix is firm & closed. The cerclage is in place. Cervix measures 4.5-5cm in length. Cervix does not respond to contractions of the uterus. All of these things were sweet music to my ears! Then the scan starts to check out Baby Ethan. He was a little wiggle worm and doing just fine as he was relaxing with his hand on his forehead. Heartbeat 145bpm. Amniotic fluid looked great. Everything was okay!

YET, I still had one MAJOR question. WHY IS MY UTERUS CONTRACTING?

The u/s tech really tried to find an answer but admitted that she really didn’t know but she was certain that Dr. G. would have answers. I saw Dr. G. and answers he did have.

1. My body is supposed to produce some type of inhibitor during pregnancy to block contractions…my inhibitor blocker is on vacation.

2. Because my band is placed so high, I am going to feel these contractions sooner than experienced in normal pregnancy & at a higher frequency/intensity.

I could deal with these answers. So, the plan:

• Start the progesterone injections RIGHT AWAY! These are weekly intramuscular injections that are used to quiet the uterus.

• Listen to my body and rest when needed.

• Call him for anything if I am the least bit worried.

I LOVE Dr. G. He said that I could come see him everyday if I needed too..and he was serious. He calls me his favorite patient and HE IS my favorite ( earthly) doctor. :0)

I started the injections Friday afternoon to quiet the uterus but she’s been anything but quiet since the initiation of the injections. I’d like to put a sign on my uterus to say

” QUIET PLEASE” .Although the contractions continue, I’m okay with it as long as I know that this will be the “ NEW normal” for the remainder of the pregnancy. I will gladly endure this minor discomfort for it will eventually lead to a journey full of love and the life of Ethan!

April 8th..a day of LOVE!!!

This is such a special day! In 2005, Chris & I officially began this love voyage after 10 months of an amazing friendship. We dated for one year & on April 8, 2006, he asked me be his wife! I am so glad that I said YES! I am so glad that I chose to let God heal me from past relationships so that I could fully give love and fully receive an extraordinary love from an extraordinary man, who happens to be my friend. How did 5 years go by so fast? I am thankful to God for the love that we share. Therefore, we celebrate each path along this wonderful journey of love & life!